I missed it by a while, and I actually had a lot to say at the time, but my 20th Birthday was on August 31st.

I want to say THANK YOU SO MUUUCH to anyone who remembered, here, Facebook, or Myspace, and wished me a happy Birthday! It meant so much to me that anyone thought of me that day, I can't even tell you. <3



19 was a personal struggle of a year, for me, from start to finish. I want to try to treat 20 like New Years, to try to make it a better year. A lot of 19's events and issues are bleeding through, but I'm taking more steps to make things better than I had been, I guess. I just need to grab ahold of everything, again.

The best explanation I can give for my inactivity and general silence often is that I am dealing with severe depression, and have been for a long time. It comes with a loss of interest, or at least effort to look interested, in things that I wouldn't even have to go out of my way to do. I'm not trying for sympathy, and I really don't even like to talk much about it because of that, but I'm trying to get myself medication and am also in therapy for this and my social anxiety/phobias. I'm trying to dig out of the rut. At least at this moment I feel more pleasantly numb than much else.

So. The game-plan for the next while is unclear. There are some personal/family/home/living condition problems that aren't making things much better, and my insomnia is pretty rabid at this point, but I'm alive.



BUT! Let's try to be positive, for the sake of being alive, here. This is life, and all that. This journal is like a pie, because the crust is the happy part, and it's on the bottom. How's that. <3

I'm not trying to bitch and moan, even though I say that and always do, and I even have a journal I do that in that is private to spare everyone said bitching and moaning, but I guess I felt like I needed something update-ish, here.



This all isn't to say that I haven't been drawing. Mostly doodles over at my oekaki, I'll try to post some of those later-soon, if I remember.

I've been checking everyone's updates often, and it actually cheers me up to see art by all of my friends/talented people on here, even if I don't comment nearly as often as I should, and hardly ever reply to comments. I read them, and love them, I assure you. <3

I am like a lurker, but I lurk with love, and know that Missy is in ur DAz, stalkin ur art an givin it lovinz, in my own way. :3

Even if that's a little creepy..
I won't tell you if I'm literally molesting your art.
Or what that stain is.. :0


COMMISSION INFO IS HEAH.
[link]